Family Ties

We have finally arrived in Paraguay! A country that I have heard so much about from the whole Bonham clan and yet, a country that I could hardly locate on a map before I met Luke. Before arriving, we left Uruguay and headed north to visit one of the most magnificent natural wonders I have ever seen- Iguazu Falls. We saw the falls from the Argentina side and from dozens of viewpoints, you can see different angles of the smaller waterfalls cascading over the edge. It is impossible to stay dry or to leave without thinking about the power and faithfulness of God, as observed by His creation. In my opinion, Iguazu blows Niagara Falls (in NY) and Victoria Falls (in Zimbabwe) right out of the water (no pun intended).


Iguazu Falls


Leaving Puerto Iguazu (definitely the most touristy place we have been besides Machu Picchu), we boarded a bus that would take us to Paraguay. After a little jaunt through Brazil, we crossed a bridge and noticed that we had entered Paraguay. The bus was showing no signs of stopping and we asked a man next to us if we were going to pass through immigration. He said of course not! Everyone else on the bus was just coming for the day to go shopping in Ciudad del Este, a city where Portuguese is just as common as Spanish and Brazilians and everyone else come only to buy things, especially electronics, and take them back to their respective homes, where they can sell for more. So we had to tell the driver to let us off blocks after customs and explain that we were actually staying to visit Paraguay, which came as a shock to him. Oh yes, and then the tourist information guy asked if he could take a picture with us with our backpacks… which should have been my first sign that many tourists don’t pass through Paraguay.

Although it is definitely off the beaten backpackers track and you can read the Paraguay section in the Lonely Planet guide book in one sitting, this country is turning out to be a very special one for many reasons, the biggest one probably being FAMILY.



As many of you know, Luke lived in Paraguay from the ages of 5-9 with his parents and two older sisters. During that time, Rusty and Mary Lou were working with indigenous people and putting their nursing skills to good use. Meanwhile, little Luke was running around barefoot, eating lots of mangoes, playing soccer and jabbering away in Spanish with his Paraguayan friends. Up until now, I have only been able to imagine all of those experiences. But now, I feel like I am getting a glimpse into what life was actually like for him during the season of his life that was spent in Paraguay. I am getting to meet all of the extended family that still lives here and also see how the time spent here has shaped Luke and his family into who they are. It is exciting to see Luke reminisce about his childhood and have little memories come back to him as we are walking through a grocery store and he sees some of his favorite treats (Simba guarana soda or Bon o Bon candies) or as we are watching the soccer game of his favorite team (Cerro Porteno) or as he bites into chipa (a special and delicious bread made of maize). I now understand why the Bonhams drink terere (yerba mate served with ice water, instead of hot and generally out of a cow’s horn) ALL of the time. Guampa (the special cup you drink it out of) and thermos are basically an extension of any Paraguayan’s body and they will be drinking at any moment, doesn’t matter the time or place. The government has even recently made it illegal to drive while drinking terere! The pieces of the puzzle are falling into place and I am beginning to better understand the man that I love and have the rest of my life to continue to get to know.


Me with Nyah and Emily

Although most of our family is far from us, we have felt very much among family with Luke’s relatives. We got to spend a week with one of his cousins (Anton), wife (Faith), and their three kids (Nyah, Emily, and Jordan) in Tres Palmas. We had a blast, spending a lot of time with the kids, helping them enjoy their last week of summer vacation. We hunted for mangoes, drank a lot of terere, had a living room campout, and even got to teach many of the card games that we have perfected on this trip. It was a very tranquilo (calm) week and we felt very much a part of the family as we were invited to Nyah and Jordan’s birthday party and even got to have a hot dog cookout with the neighbors (the Brauns, who are also distant relatives). We also got to see the house where Mary Lou lived and the hospital where Luke’s grandparents worked for many years. His family seems to be legendary in these parts! As soon as anyone finds out that he is Rusty and Mary Lou’s son, he always gets another big hug and comments on how funny anecdotes that people remember about his parents. Little did we know that our time of relaxing in Tres Palmas (east Paraguay) would prepare us to work and be in the capital city of Asuncion, where we currently are.


Alto Refugio's newly donated hotel, future housing for HIV/AIDS mothers with children, where we are currently staying.

We are staying with an aunt and uncle (Dave and Judy) and have the pleasure of helping out at the awesome ministry they have started, called Alto Refugio (www.altorefugio.org/). It is a drop in center right across the street from a public hospital that specializes in HIV/AIDS testing and services. They offer simple things like meals, counseling, beds to sleep in, some medication, and other necessities, but more than that, they provide a place for people to feel welcome and among family. People can come and take a nap if they have travelled far to come for an appointment. They can come for counseling or the weekly support group. Or they can come to volunteer and help serve other people who are living with HIV/AIDS. In a sense, we are experiencing family here as well- not one bound by blood, but by brotherly love in Christ. We have only been there a week so far and have two more to go, but we have really felt that sense of camaraderie there and enjoyed hearing the stories of some of the patients who regularly come in...and Luke got to go dumpster diving at the yogurt factory with Dave. We are also relearning what it means to wake up at 6:30am and work a full day! That way, we won’t be SO out of it when we get home.

Over the next couple weeks, we’ll get the chance to visit more family members and then in three weeks, Mary Lou, Rusty and Hannah join us! It has been great to be among family and reminds me how important those ties and relationships are. I am really enjoying meeting all of Luke’s relatives and remembering all these new names isn’t as hard as I thought it would be.  As we meet more family and I see more of Luke’s past, it is exciting to think about the traditions and experiences that both he and I bring into this marriage and this new family that we are creating.



Game night with Dave and Judy and family