2016: A Year in Review

It feels like the years are flying by around here and I often have no way of distinguishing one year from the next.  I wanted to take a few minutes to highlight some of the biggest memories of 2016, mainly just for myself when I look back later.  This year was marked mainly by adjusting to life with a daughter and figuring out how to be parents.  We continued our volunteering with Foster Parents Night Out, thanks to grandparents being willing to watch Dahlia each month.  Luke coached a soccer program for work and was heavily involved in the planning and execution of a neighborhood orchard.  I found myself often at the library for story times, and also found ways to volunteer, at my old school and also at Zenger Farm, continuing with their Healthy Eating on a Budget classes.  We were able to support many friends and families by taking meals after new babies were born and folks were walking through hard times.  We also had the chance to welcome many more foster kids into our home.  Since I stopped working, we have had the flexibility to have kids for longer periods of time, the longest being a little over a month.  Kids have been in our home as they are in the process of waiting to transition back to family members or if they need a place to go while a more permanent foster home is found for them.  We had 17 children in our home, ranging from 18 months to 16 years old.  We got to experience many ordinary moments with these kiddos like homework, playing at the park, reading books, and driving to appointments.  We also got to experience many special moments like birthday parties, taking kids to the ocean for the first time, and seeing families reunite.  That has continued to be a challenging and rewarding way to extend radical hospitality to young people who so desperately need it.  Now, month by month...

January:
*Welcomed the year hiking at Silver Falls State Park
*Luke went on a winter backpacking trip in the snow with some friends to Lena Lake, up in the Olympics
*We made soap out of the lard from a pig we butchered


 

February:
*We spend a weekend at Rockaway Beach with family- Dahlia's first time to the ocean!
*ML's sister Lisa and her husband Ray visited
*Bagby Hot Springs!

March:
*Nothing too out of the ordinary


April:
*We went to go see the magnolias blooming in Washington Park.  What an incredible sight we have always heard so much about!
*My parents sold their home in Vancouver

May:
*We dedicated Dahlia at our church home of Imago Dei Community
*Helped my parents move into a rental home that they will stay in until they are ready to make their next step
*Adelman Peony Farm down I-5 was an incredible sight with all the flowers blooming and it was free!  Way better than the tulip festival.

June:
*Chicago trip to see Hannah and Quilen's new place and all the work they're doing on the Chicago Eco House
*An awesome women only bike ride with folks from Bridger
*Early warm days at one of our favorite spots, Oxbow Park with our good friends, Brandon and Victoria
*My grandpa passed away and we got to see a lot of family during the memorial service and weekend

July:
*Some wonderful camping including up by Mt. Hood, where we got to hike two trails we've been wanting to check out for a long time, Ramona Falls and McNeil Point
*Avett Brothers concert at Edgefield
*Camping up by Mt. Adams- Dahlia is a real trooper when it comes to camping!

August:
*My sister and her family here for their annual visit.  Lots of wonderful time with them, including camping, floating at the river, lazer tag, and sleepovers.  The kids are 9 and 11- such fun ages!  And it was so great to see them interact with Dahlia
*Our dear friend and old neighbor, Theta, passed away.  It was so sweet that Erin got to be here for the funeral

September:
*Josh Garrels concert at Revolution Hall for our 6th anniversary date
*Bluegrass festival up at Timberline Lodge, kicking off a weeklong adventure, that led us to Bagby, Breitenbush and camping at Olallie Lake.  One last summer hurrah!


October:
*Cook at the MCC Sale down in Albany- delicious seasonal veggie sandwiches on homemade foccacia bread
*Our 4th annual neighborhood apple cider pressing party

November:
*I finally made it to a harvest with the Portland Fruit Tree Project and picked persimmons
*Hannah came to visit and travelled with us to Montana for Thanksgiving.  Much of our time in Kalispell was spent with Luke's aunt, Tauntie, who had just found out she had cancer and had surgery a few days before we all arrived.  Our feast wasn't the same without her!

December:
*My dad got his knee replaced
*I hosted my 2nd annual cookie exchange party with girlfriends
*We got to enjoy a week with Luke off of work, in which he did lots of little house projects and we got to snowshoe up on Hood
*We ended the year with a group of old college friends and their families.  I think the adults were outnumbered by children and the party might have started at 4pm ;)

Welcoming Dahlia Kay at home

When we found out at we were expecting a child last year, we were so excited to experience all that pregnancy and labor would entail as they ushered us into our new roles as parents.  What I wasn't expecting was how many decisions would have to be made in the process.  I recognize and acknowledge that the birth of a child is something unique to each mother and the circumstances surrounding the welcome of the child to the world.  Today, I want to share a little bit about my decision to have our daughter at home and what that experience was like for me and my family.  

In my husband's family, home birth was considered the norm.  He was delivered in rural Kansas at his home by his grandpa.  His sister delivered her two kids at home by water birth.  In my family, hospital births were the only thing that I had ever heard about.  I had never been present at anyone's birth, so I had little to no preconceived notions of how it would go.  

At the beginning of my pregnancy, I started my prenatal care at our local Kaiser Permanente office.  After I had a few prenatal appointments, I began to wonder if there was another way after being seen by a different provider at each month's appointment.  We decided to interview the midwives at Rosehip Midwifery on the recommendation of a neighbor who had worked with them, and were excited to find that their office was a mere 20 blocks from our house (I rode my bike to prenatal appointments up until the day before she was born!)  

We quickly decided to work with the team of women there (2 licensed/certified midwives and one apprentice at the local Birthingway College of Midwifery).  Several things influenced my decision:

*I felt at ease with the team and appreciated knowing that they would be the same ones working with me through my prenatal, delivery and postpartum period.  It wouldn't be left up to chance who was on call when I happened to go into labor. I predicted that I would be able to be more relaxed if I had a relationship with the people who were supporting me during labor.

*We took a tour of the birthing rooms at the hospital I would be delivering at and took into account my past negative reactions in hospitals (I have passed out several times during a variety of visits, including when I am not the patient and am just visiting people).  Recognizing that birth is an intense experience and that the hospital setting might be inhibitive to my body relaxing enough to do what it was meant to do.

*We watched the documentary "The Business of Being Born" and acknowledged the high rate at which the medical model interferes with the natural process of birth. 

*I wanted to have a natural birth without medication or medical intervention.

*I wanted to trust in birth as a natural process, not as some sort of ailment or illness that needed to be fixed.  Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth shares some beautiful birth stories and gave me a better sense of what to expect during labor.  

After all was said and done, there were a couple of other unexpected things that confirmed my positive experience with the midwives:

-The midwives allowed us to take control of our decisions.  Their role was to inform us and allow us to decide, supporting us in whatever we decided.   

-The postpartum support was incredible.  After Dahlia was born, the midwives took her vitals, cleaned up, got us all situated, and left us to delight in the newest addition to our family.  They came to us at our house for postpartum visits at 1 day, 2 days, 1 week and 2 weeks.  It was so wonderful to not have to load up in the carseat to make it to an appointment on time.  Also, the frequent check-in was helpful for me in my first days of motherhood.  They were available by text or phone call whenever we had questions or I needed lactation support.

-The birthing tub was great to use as pain management

-I was grateful to be able to be in our own space.  I could eat or drink throughout all of labor.  We got to wear whatever clothes we wanted- no hospital gowns here!  I was able to set the tone for the space, filling it with things that relaxed me and gave me strength.  I was able to move freely about our home during labor and ended up having Dahlia in our bed. 

-We were able to have our families close by (Mary Lou made a big pot of spaghetti and our families were outside eating by the fire pit while I was inside laboring!)

-The midwives knew what they were doing and were able to guide me through the birthing process (they gave me an IV at one point when I became seriously dehydrated, were constantly checking baby and mama's vitals, and even gave me a few stitches afterward).  There are some serious misconceptions about the training and certification of midwives.  These ladies were highly trained, well prepared and wouldn't have hesitated to transfer me to a nearby hospital if it had been needed for me or Dahlia's safety.

-It cost less than birthing at a hospital.  The only bummer is that at this point in time, home birth isn't covered by most insurance, so the cost must be paid out of pocket.

I would strongly recommend home birth as a viable and positive experience to any woman with a low risk pregnancy.  It is one of the most empowering experiences I have ever had in my life and I am so grateful that it was how we welcomed our daughter.

*One of the most unexpected parts for me was that Dahlia has three more women in her life who care about her deeply and are connected to her in a beautifully unique way.  Seeing midwives delight in a newborn baby is unlike anything else!  We are grateful to Heather, Emilia and Rachel for being a part of our family's story.*